Sunday, June 06, 2004
The tired warrior aims a little higher
The above quote is from one of the weirder songs Neil Young ever wrote, that being 1992's "War of Man", which appears to be about how wars hurt animals. Or something. I bring this up because "War of Man" (along with what must be the worst song Young ever wrote, "Old King" - written in tribute to his late dog, Elvis - which contains the brilliant couplet "Old King sure meant a lot to me/But that hound dog is history") is from the "Harvest Moon" album, which I had been avoiding listening to for a couple of months. Finally bringing myself volume to ear with it today, it occurs to me that I shouldn't have waited so long.
Anyway, it occurs to me that I haven't posted anything about my job on here since getting it, and for an excellent reason: my job is stupid. Oh, I suppose, living as I do in Yuppie Central, the work I do is important, and I've met some very nice people - Justin, Stephanie, Peggy, Arlene, and Hag-Ra, Bitch Queen of Aisle Seven - but, by and large, it's pretty unblogworthy. A few things that do perhaps rate a mention:
1. I have developed a propensity for meat theft. This is because meat must be bagged separately to avoid cross-contamination, so, when meat comes through, I always bag it to my right, and leave it in the bag until more meat of the same kind comes along. Other groceries get bagged to the left. Sometimes, I cheerfully give people their groceries, and then, when the next customer tries to buy meat and I once again look to my right, there will be the previous customer's meat. So I return it to the shelves without telling anybody.
2. I hated my first customer last week. This would be the customer who showed up with two carts of groceries at eleven o'clock, after the announcement that goes over the store saying "Good evening, customers, it is now eleven o'clock and the store is closed. Please bring your purchases to the cashiers and pay for them, assuming that there is a reasonable number of them. If you have more than one cart full, please return your groceries to the shelves, exit the store, and go die just off of store property. We hate you. Have a nice night." To her credit, she didn't request parcel pickup.
3. It has come as a revelation to me how many people put their bananas in those little produce bags.
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The above quote is from one of the weirder songs Neil Young ever wrote, that being 1992's "War of Man", which appears to be about how wars hurt animals. Or something. I bring this up because "War of Man" (along with what must be the worst song Young ever wrote, "Old King" - written in tribute to his late dog, Elvis - which contains the brilliant couplet "Old King sure meant a lot to me/But that hound dog is history") is from the "Harvest Moon" album, which I had been avoiding listening to for a couple of months. Finally bringing myself volume to ear with it today, it occurs to me that I shouldn't have waited so long.
Anyway, it occurs to me that I haven't posted anything about my job on here since getting it, and for an excellent reason: my job is stupid. Oh, I suppose, living as I do in Yuppie Central, the work I do is important, and I've met some very nice people - Justin, Stephanie, Peggy, Arlene, and Hag-Ra, Bitch Queen of Aisle Seven - but, by and large, it's pretty unblogworthy. A few things that do perhaps rate a mention:
1. I have developed a propensity for meat theft. This is because meat must be bagged separately to avoid cross-contamination, so, when meat comes through, I always bag it to my right, and leave it in the bag until more meat of the same kind comes along. Other groceries get bagged to the left. Sometimes, I cheerfully give people their groceries, and then, when the next customer tries to buy meat and I once again look to my right, there will be the previous customer's meat. So I return it to the shelves without telling anybody.
2. I hated my first customer last week. This would be the customer who showed up with two carts of groceries at eleven o'clock, after the announcement that goes over the store saying "Good evening, customers, it is now eleven o'clock and the store is closed. Please bring your purchases to the cashiers and pay for them, assuming that there is a reasonable number of them. If you have more than one cart full, please return your groceries to the shelves, exit the store, and go die just off of store property. We hate you. Have a nice night." To her credit, she didn't request parcel pickup.
3. It has come as a revelation to me how many people put their bananas in those little produce bags.
